I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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