Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
