O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
