just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
