God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
