Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
