I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
