I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
