After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize