I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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