I'm drive I can fine osifer
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
