weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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