Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
