I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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