I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
