i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
