I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
