Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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