Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
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