i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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