Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
