Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
