Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
