2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
