Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
