Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
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