I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
love makes seman taste better
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
