Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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