i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
