Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize