it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize