the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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