Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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