is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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