Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
