if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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