She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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