If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
