It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
