She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize