she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Randomize
