OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
