You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
