I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize
