What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Randomize
