I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
