plz talk dirty to me
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize