Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
