I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize