I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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